Modern-day fertility superstitions

Folk remedies for couples trying to conceive

 

Fertility rituals aren't just a thing of the ancient past. Many contemporary couples who are trying to conceive will tack on a few superstitions to their regimen of prescription medication and charting their basal body temperature.  
 
The one I have heard most often is to plant a rosemary bush in your front yard. I know of three couples who have done this. Although that might speak more to the fact that rosemary grows well in our climate than to the popularity of this myth. (All three ended up conceiving, by the way. Although I'm not sure if the rosemary bush had as much to do with that as the IVF procedure.)
 
For women who are already pregnant, few things are as obnoxious or awkward as the way that suddenly it's fair game for complete strangers - men and women both - to walk up and start stroking your belly with their hands. So please be courteous and ask politely before doing this!
 
This superstition has obvious roots in the magical concept of transference. Logically we know that touching a pregnant person won't pass the magical pregnancy power to ourselves. But it's an appealing thought to women who are trying to conceive. And it's a great way to strike up a conversation about the difficulties of pregnancy.
 
This superstition actually has its roots in observable fact. Researchers noted that the rate of twins in the African village of Igbo-Ora is higher than anywhere else in the world. After controlling for all the factors they could think of, the researchers finally decided that it must be all the yams that the villagers eat.
 
It should be noted that no subsequent study was ever able to prove a link between yams and twins, and that this is probably just a case of "correlation does not imply causation." But it should also be noted that yams are good for you, and you should eat them anyway.
 
In the 1980s researchers theorized that the primary ingredient in Robitussin (guaifenesin) might be helpful for couples trying to conceive. Their theory was that it would help thin cervical mucus the same way that it thins sinus mucus. 
 
This turned out not to be the case (P.S. your cervix is not the same as your nose) but nevertheless it served to cement this popular cough medicine as an OTC fertility treatment.
 

Medicinal cannibalism: The cure for what ails you

This grotesque practice is more common than you might think.

There aren't many taboos that you could truly consider global, but cannibalism is one of them. Thus it is perhaps not surprising that the act of violating the taboo is often considered to be an extremely powerful one. Any decent magic (or psychology) textbook will tell you, the bigger the taboo, the more power it holds. 

These days, medicinal cannibalism is practiced most often in Asian countries, where it is an extremely rare practice of traditional medicine in South Korea and China. It has created a smuggling epidemic so widespread that the Chinese government was forced to launch an official investigation. 
 
According to the Chinese government, aborted Chinese fetuses are not - repeat, not - being sold on the black market, dried, pulverized, put in gelatin capsules, and smuggled to South Korea for sale. However, there is the small matter of the smugglers that keep getting caught with loads of the stuff. According to customs agents, about 35 of these smuggling attempts were intercepted in 2011 with a total of 17,000 capsules. And that's just the ones who got caught.
 
In Europe from the 11th century well into the 19th century, physicians were convinced that the powdered flesh of a mummy could cure blood-related problems, including coughs, menstrual issues, and blood clots. This created a bustling trade in robbing the tombs of Egypt's ancient rulers, a ransacking of history on an appalling scale not seen before or since. 
 
Once the Egyptian mummies ran out, doctors turned to "mellified man," which is what you get when you soak a corpse in an herbal honey mixture. The corpses of strong men were preferred, as it was assumed that the man's strength would be transferred (via his preserved flesh) to the patient. 
 
This homeopathic belief that "like cures like" also led to the use of the blood of slain gladiators as a reviving drink in Roman times. Call it the original Red Bull: the blood of the dead gladiator was thought to pass on the fighter's vitality and pizzazz (although it must be noted that the gladiator in question clearly didn't have enough vitality to avoid being killed in combat). 
 
Along the same lines, people suffering from headaches, migraines, or epilepsy were often advised to drink a beverage made with the powder from a ground-up skull. This remedy was recorded several times, most recently as a prescription issued to an Englishman in 1847 whose daughter suffered from epilepsy.

Paris syndrome strikes Japanese tourists

Beware the City of Lights!

Paris syndrome is one of several oddball psychiatric illnesses which strike specific travelers in specific places, like Jerusalem syndrome. In the case of Paris syndrome, the problem is almost completely specific to Japanese tourists visiting Paris for the first time.

The symptoms of Paris syndrome include hallucinations, feelings of persecution (specifically of being a victim of prejudice), depersonalization, anxiety, and the dizziness and tachycardia that come along with it. The syndrome was first described by a Japanese psychiatrist working in France in 1986, and was officially recognized with journal publication in 2004. Luckily the numbers are low, only striking about 20 out of the estimated six million Japanese tourists who visit Paris annually.
 
The roots of Paris syndrome lie partially in the Japanese media. As much as we in America have idealized Paris, Japan's television and magazine industry have kicked that up times ten thousand. In Japan, Paris is seen as a perfect, beautiful city filled with perfect, beautiful people who all - each and every one - look and dress like runway models. The Japanese media presentation of Paris is also notably affluent, giving the impression that everyone in Paris is rich and constantly swaddled in luxury.
 
Then you get to Paris and find that it is wonderful, yes, but it is also a real city filled with real people. Just like every city, Paris has crime, and, dirty streets, and homeless people. Some of them are rich and some are poor, some are fat and some are thin, some are pretty and others are ugly and on all three counts, most people fall somewhere in the middle. The chasm between the idealized Japanese vision of Paris and the reality of Paris is significant - big enough that some people simply cannot assimilate the truth before them, and experience a sort of temporary psychotic break.
 
Paris syndrome is basically an amped-up version of culture shock, the disorientation felt by most travelers who suddenly find themselves in an unfamiliar environment. It doesn't help that Japanese tourists have difficulty with the language and vice versa (although many Parisians speak English, few speak Japanese), not to mention the exhaustion of travel and being a tourist. And while Americans may be armored against certain cultural issues thanks to the stereotype of French people being rude, Japanese people may find it a shock when they encounter what could be considered rude behavior on the part of the Parisians.
 

Sandy Hook "truthers" terrorize retired psychologist

Gene Rosen is being relentlessly hounded by Internet goons.

On the morning of the Newtown shooting, a 69-year-old retired psychologist named Gene Rosen stepped outside to feed his cats. To his surprise, he found "four terrified children hiding out in his driveway." The children told Rosen that their teacher was dead. He stayed with them while the tragedy continued to unfold at Sandy Hook Elementary, about a block away.

And now the "truthers" who believe that the Sandy Hook event was a hoax are making Rosen's life a living hell. Apparently they have decided that, if the Newtown shooting was faked (in the parlance of internet conspiracy theorists, a "false flag operation") then Rosen was obviously one of its primary actors. And thus, he should be relentlessly hounded and harassed 24/7 because ???
 
Rosen was interviewed by several media outlets on the day of the shooting. Clips of his interviews are being endlessly and mercilessly "debunked" on truther websites. Imagine being interviewed on the worst day of your life… and then imagine a bunch of anonymous conspiracy theorists trash talking every aspect of your appearance and demeanor.
 
It's always fun to feel like you know something that everyone else doesn't know, is too stupid to know. It's a warm feeling, to think that you refuse to have the wool pulled over your eyes like everyone else. But it's also easy to get hooked on that feeling. You start having to up the ante, increase your dosage. And the next thing you know, you find yourself vehemently arguing that those children weren't shot, or that the government sent in a SWAT team to shoot a bunch of schoolchildren, and then put together a massive conspiracy between the government, every single media outlet, and everyone who lived within a five block radius of the school.
 
The real truth is that bad things happen in the world. Random things. No one is in charge. I understand the allure of the fantasy that some shadowy organization is engineering these events. It's reassuring, in a weird way. But it's wrong and childish to think this way.
 
Meanwhile, the true conspiracies in our world go unaddressed. Why? Because "capitalism feeds off the poor" isn't as sexy or media-friendly as "Sandy Hook was staged." Or because "elections are won by the rich" lacks a specific human face to badger. The real conspiracies are bigger and foggier, and I guess maybe it's easier to dox some poor old dude whose only crime was giving safe harbor to some terrified children who had just escaped a massacre.

Alex Jones freaks out Piers Morgan (and everyone else)

Notorious conspiracy theorist loses it on national television.

Alex Jones is a central figure in the contemporary field of conspiracy theories. His radio show has taken over a huge segment of what used to be Art Bell's audience, back in the day. His websites and podcast and articles are nutty, sure, but you would hardly have expected the kind of insane ranting that he burst into when interviewed by Piers Morgan.

Some people - including no less than Glenn Beck - are wondering if Morgan invited Jones on his show specifically because he knew Jones would freak out, thus discrediting Second Amendment fanatics everywhere. It's not an implausible theory, which says more about Piers Morgan and the insatiable hunger of the 24-hour news cycle than it does about Alex Jones.
 
Jones has always stuck up for the lunatic fringe. In 1998, he helped rebuild the Branch Davidian church after the ATF destroyed the first one in the standoff with David Koresh. Next, Jones hit the big time when he advocated that a government conspiracy was behind the Oklahoma City bombing. 
 
It takes a special kind of person to position white power zealots as the underdog, and champion their cause in public. In fact, no less an authority than the Southern Poverty Law Center has Jones on their list of bad guys for his constant effort to "appeal to the fears of the antigovernment Patriot movement."
 
Not only is Alex Jones a fan of the Second Amendment, he fervently believes that it is the only thing that will stand between us and tyranny. I mean this literally. Jones has long forecast a military takeover of our nation which will only be defeated by "true patriots" and their stockpiles of guns. Jones is vehemently opposed to any form of gun control, which he sees as the first step in the long slide into complete totalitarianism. 
 
Long story short, if America experiences another Civil War, Alex Jones will be at the helm.
 
Even given his history, Jones' lengthy angry violent rant at Piers Morgan was over the top, even for him. Morgan later commented that he found Jones "terrifying," "an advertisement for gun control," and that "it was based on a premise of making Americans so fearful that they all rush out to buy even more guns."  
 
If Jones was seeking a national stage, he sure got it on Morgan's show. And I suppose we shouldn't be terribly surprised what happened when he did.

Mysterious nation-wide rash of Tide thefts

This sudsy crime is on the rise.

The first few times I heard about this, I dismissed it out of hand. But it keeps cropping up, with supporting comments from people all over the country, so I am finally willing to concede that it is A Thing. Apparently, organized shoplifting rings are targeting, of all things, jugs of Tide liquid laundry detergent.

This may seem preposterous on the face of it. And it doesn't help that the Tide corporation is taking a stance on the issue that seems insufferably smug. According to Tide, these thefts are happening because they have done such a great job with brand recognition. People steal Tide (according to Tide) because people love Tide. In other words, according to Tide's marketing department, the thefts mean they are doing their job right. 
 
And they aren't wrong; it's not like Tide loses money when their detergent is stolen from a grocery store. Tide gets paid either way. It's the grocery store (or its insurance company) that foots the bill. 
 
So who is stealing all this Tide, and why? Unsurprisingly, the answer boils down to "drug addicts."
 
If you are a crack addict looking to make a quick buck to feed your habit, your options are slim. One of the more tempting options is to steal things, and then resell them on the street. If you steal something that's worth $10 and you sell it for $5, both you and the buyer got a great deal. 
 
The question then becomes, what to steal? These thieves used to steal baby formula, condoms, batteries, and high-end razor blades. But as they became more theft-worthy, stores have moved those items behind locked cabinets. (When I was a kid, cigarettes were sold in open racks at the front of the store, like candy bars.) 
 
Enter Tide laundry detergent. Tide has the name brand recognition that consumers want, which is why it is the #1 most popular laundry detergent in America by a wide margin. The jugs even have a convenient carrying handle, for the shoplifter on the run. 
 
They are heavy, certainly, but they are also waterproof, durable, and easy to tote around. Best of all, people want to buy Tide. And given the high cost of laundry detergent, a lot of people are willing to buy it off some guy at the bus stop in order to save a few bucks.
 
Another market for stolen goods is mom and pop stores. Many of these stores buy stolen goods at a steep discount, then resell them to their customers at a mark-up. In 2011 police busted a massive shoplifting ring that had been funneling stolen goods through smaller stores across King county.
 

UFO explosion recorded over California?

Well... probably not.

On December 20, a man named Elijah Prychodzko described as an "amateur astronomer" was looking into the late afternoon sky over Sacramento, CA when he recorded an unusual sight. According to his account, it was a bright light that was hovering, circled by a smaller white light, and then it exploded.

Prychodzko posted a message to his local news station's Facebook page, asking if they wanted to see the video. They did, and aired it later that night.
 
Let's start with some observations: first, this video would be trivial to fake. Literally child's play. The provenance (a poorly-worded Facebook post) certainly doesn't do the video a great service. I could think of three ways to fake this with practical effects off the top of my head. Or you could do it in about five minutes using CGI. 
 
Prychodzko claims he recorded the video by putting his smartphone camera against the viewfinder. This explains the atrocious quality of the video, but it is also a convenient way to hide any inconsistencies (like dangling wires or obvious CGI-itude) in the source video. It's basically the UFO equivalent of a Blobsquatch.
 
But let's indulge speculation as if that weren't the case. I would not describe this (as many news outlets have) as an explosion "in space." The sky is clearly blue in the video, and Prychodzko was observing in the late afternoon. Thus, this object was almost certainly inside Earth's atmosphere at the time.
 
The object is often described as "hovering," but it looks to me as though it is falling. Something bright falling from the sky in broad daylight which then seems to explode… that's not a mysterious object. It could be a chunk of space junk, a daylight (a.k.a. "fireball") meteor, or just a parachute flare. 
 
In fact, I suspect it's a flare. This would explain why it's so bright (by design) and the way it seems to descend slowly (the flare's parachute being either obscured by the bad video quality or edited out by a hoaxer). It would also explain the bright bits that seem to fly off it as it descends (something you frequently see with flares). And it would explain the explosion at the end.
 
For reference, here's some video I found of a parachute flare being set off during the daytime. As you can see, it looks almost identical to the object Prychodzko (knowingly or not) caught on his telescope.
 

2013: The year of triskaidekaphobia

Do you believe in unlucky 13, or lucky 13?

If you have a superstitious dread of the number 13 (a condition technically known as "triskaidekaphobia") then this will be a bad year for you. Unlike the floors in multi-story buildings, we can't just skip 2013 and call it 2014 instead. But you can count your luck that there isn't a thirteenth month, otherwise you would have to suffer through 13/13/13!

There are a lot of reasons given for why Western cultures consider the number 13 to be unlucky. But you can find these patterns throughout history if you care to look for them. You could just as easily amass a damning collection of facts about the number 11 or 8. And most other cultures have their own unlucky numbers. (In Asian countries, 4 is the equivalent of 13 as a number to be feared and many multi-storied buildings lack a 4th floor.)
 
Perhaps the most substantial connection between 13 and bad luck is that there were 13 people seated at the Last Supper. This is why dinner party hosts are urged to never have 13 people at the same table. Judas was the last person to be seated, the 13th guest, and look how that turned out.
 
Why is Friday the 13th particularly bad news? (I mean, aside from being the title of a long-running horror movie franchise of varying quality.) One theory holds that Fridays were considered bad luck because in medieval Europe, that's when the hangmen plied their trade. Add that to the unlucky number 13 and you have an all-purpose bad luck day, for no real reason.
 
(By the way, there is only one Friday the 13th in 2013. It falls in September.)
 
Of course, 13 is also considered a lucky number. In fact, in a highly unscientific survey which I just conducted at Googlefight.com, "lucky 13" beats out "unlucky 13" by a wide margin. You could argue that this is because Lucky 13 is the name of a popular clothing manufacturer. But I say it's all just a matter of cause and effect. The clothing manufacturer obviously took its name from the idea of 13 being lucky, not the other way around.
 
According to speculation on Wikipedia, 13's powerful reputation may be due to many cultures following a lunar calendar in which a year has 12 normal months and then one smaller "often portentous" thirteenth month. It's as good an explanation as any.
 

New Year's Eve superstitions

So many of them!

Every culture around the world has superstitions for ringing in the new year. (Including the Chinese, although their calendar doesn't roll over until the lunar new year, which usually happens in late January or early February.) What all of these superstitions have in common is a belief that the things you do (or avoid doing) on the first day of the year set the pattern for all of the days that follow. 

 
This is an understandable thing, given that the change of the calendar is a notable event every year. But the sheer volume of related superstitions is astounding. It rivals, in both number and variety, the superstitions surrounding major events like death or childbirth. Although maybe that makes sense, since the new year is when the old year dies and the new year is born. 
 
The superstition which is the most commonly practiced in the United States has to do with eating beans (which symbolize both coins and plenitude) and greens (which symbolize money). Every year, grocery stores across America are stripped bare of their black-eyed peas, which are often cooked up with greens into a traditional Southern dish called "Hoppin' John."
 
(Although in my personal experience, the only thing Hoppin' John brings you in the new year is farts, and plenty of them.)
 
Aside from the traditional superstitions (clean your house to let the luck in; eat grapes to ensure prosperity) many people go through a more elaborate ritual known as "new year's resolutions." Although these traditionally prove no more effective a means for change than eating a plate of beans and sautéed greens, that doesn't stop us from making out a well-intentioned list every year, only to abandon it by the middle of January. But how else would the diet, exercise, and smoking cessation industries survive?
 
Of course, no discussion of New Year's Eve traditions and superstitions would be complete without a mention of Hollywood's belief that the person you kiss at midnight is your true forever beloved. What better time to find the love of your life (whether in a "meet cute" or not) than at a loud drunken party in the middle of the night, which was probably a work day for you as well? As unrealistic and downright bizarre as this belief may be, it still remains one of Hollywood's most sacred and cherished cinematic plot devices.
 
Honestly for most people, the most important new year's ritual to observe is the annual Drinking Lots Of Water And Taking Ibuprofen Before You Go To Bed. 
 

Frost flowers: The most beautiful natural phenomena?

Gorgeous and rare

I had never heard of frost flowers until a few days ago, when someone sent me a link to this page explaining all about them. How can I have not known about something so amazingly beautiful? 

Frost flowers (scientifically known as crystallofolia) are as ephemeral as they are breathtaking. Imagine something as delicate as one giant snowflake, and you're close. Frost flowers form under very specific conditions: the ground has to be warm enough for plants to not be dormant, and yet the air must be cold enough for frost to form. It's a difficult balance, and it means that most people will go their entire lives without seeing a frost flower in person.
 
The physics of frost flower formation are intricate. Active (i.e. non-dormant-for-winter) plants are constantly sucking water up from the ground through their stems. If the plant has not gone dormant when the air falls below freezing, the sap in its veins can freeze. When sap freezes, it expands. When this happens, it bursts the cells and stems of the plant and creates microscopic cracks. 
 
Under a particular set of conditions, the plant continues to draw water up into its stem after it has been cracked by ice formation. The water flows out of the microscopic cracks and freezes as it hits the air. More water is drawn up the stem, flows out of the cracks pushing the previously-frozen stuff forward, and freezes itself.
 
This essentially creates a situation where frost is being extruded from the leaf or stem of a plant. The shapes that it forms are called "frost flowers," and they are as amazing and as unique as snowflakes. Some of them look like puffy clouds of cotton candy; others like small trumpets made of ice, and still others form bizarre curlicues and rams' horns.
 
If you find one, the Kuriositas site recommends that you do not try to touch it. They are so fragile that they break at the slightest touch, and melt from the warmth of your fingertips. Instead, take a picture - and take it fast, because frost flowers dissolve quickly as the sun hits them or the day warms up.
 
There is another kind of phenomena called "frost flowers" which grow on newly-formed sea ice. Although these two phenomena have nothing in common but their name and the fact that they are formed by freezing water, the sea ice frost flowers are gorgeous as well.
 

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