Not mentioned: FIREPOWER.
Over the last week as I awaited the traditional annual family doom that is Thanksgiving, I watched the first season of AMC's "The Walking Dead." (I thought it was pretty good stuff, although I wish it had better roles for women than "screaming and crying.")
The CDC plays a surprisingly big role in the series. First and most obviously because the CDC is America's primary line of defense against any contagious epidemic. Zombies of course are the pinnacle of contagious epidemics: an epidemic so contagious that it literally walks (or runs, or shambles) around and bites you! And second because the CDC is headquartered in the Atlanta area, which is where the show is set.
(Question: does the real CDC headquarters have an impassive voiced computer system which locks down and [spoiler alerts] in case of disaster? Somehow I doubt it. Oh and that reminds me, the CDC sure does stockpile a lot of wine, apparently!)
You may not think of the CDC as being a lighthearted government agency with a savvy sense of humor, but apparently you would be wrong, because they have a whole thing about how to prepare for the Zombie Apocalypse.
As with most apocalypses (apocalypii?) the same general preparedness rules apply. Stockpile one gallon of water per person per day, shelf-stable foods and canned goods, medications, sanitation and hygiene supplies, etc. The CDC recommends that you stockpile "several days" of supplies, which they judge would be enough to tide your family over until you can "locate a zombie-free refugee camp."
The CDC's Zombie Preparedness article cheerfully points out that "you're a goner if a zombie bites you," which brings to mind one item that they do not have on their preparedness list: firearms. Guns are the primary line of defense against zombies. You have to take out a zombie with a head shot, and it is a lot safer to do it with a gun than to wait until the zombie gets within striking range for a baseball bat, hoe, pickaxe, maul, or other sharp implement.
Obviously the CDC isn't going to recommend that people stockpile guns and ammunition. It is after all a government agency. But if zombie movies and TV shows make one thing clear, it's that guns are the only thing that will stand between you and the shuffling, groaning horde.
(It makes me wonder when the NRA is going to put out THEIR version of a Zombie Preparedness Manual?)